Best of Tynan.net

Here are some of the best and most popular stories on my site. If you're new here, it's a good place to start. And yes, everything is true.

Archived Stories

There are 522 posts written, dating back to 2005, just dying to be read by you. Click here for the archives.

RSS Feeds

You can subscribe to my regular RSS feed, a special RSS feed for the comments.

Get Updates by Email

Type your e-mail in the box below to get posts mailed to you. No spam ever. One click unsubscribes you if you change your mind.

Email:
form tracker

Tweeter

I update a lot. Follow me at twitter.com/tynanbtyb

Message Boards

Visit the forums where members of the Tynan.net community meet. Create an account or read the messages without one.

Talk to Me

My current contact information, including phone, e-mail, myspace, facebook, and AIM can be found at tynan.tel

This is my personal blog that I keep for fun. If you like my writing, you may want to check out my other sites.

Make Her Chase You

I learned how to attract women from the best pick up artists in the world, and spend years teaching. Make Her Chase you is the complete guide I've written. Buy it on Amazon, or as an ebook.

Life Nomadic

I spend most of the year traveling to strange places, finding adventure, and writing about it. I write features regularly for the leading travel blog, Gadling.

Oct
31

Fashion

Today I drove past a store that sells guns and gold. A gun can be a lot of things, one of which is the most useful thing in the world—given the wrong situation. Gold is about survival, especially now. If the economy collapses further, as many economists predict, gold may be a safe place to keep your money.

The pairing makes sense like chicken and waffles does. Two totally different products that are both used by much of the same demographic.

Across the street was a billboard. I followed the rusty post up to the fresh advertisement at the top. “Niemann Marcus at The Domain! Manolo Blahnik! Gucci!”. Against the pink background were giant car sized images of expensive stiletto heels.

My gut reaction was shock and a tinge of disgust. Who BUYS this stuff?

Well, me for one. Not anymore, but I used to go to Niemann Marcus every week. I’d spend an hour or two going through all of the new arrivals, particularly Cavalli. I would buy nearly anything made by Cavalli, sometimes even if it didn’t fit me.

I was so into it.

That changed when Life Nomadic came into the picture. Even if I didn’t change my mindset, I knew it didn’t make sense to buy clothes I’d be leaving behind. I slowly tapered off buying new clothes.

My mindset changed when It was time to sell everything. I brought beautiful expensive clothes to the thrift store. They gave me pennies on the dollar. Shirts I had spent twenty minutes deliberating on were given a glance and thrown into a pile after being tacked with a “$5” tag.

And that’s when I had my epiphany. This stuff is worthless.

I have only one pair of pants now. They are grey brushed nylon and they zip off at the knees to make shorts. Because I wore them as shorts in the sun so much,the pant legs are a bit darker than the shorts part.

I have three shirts, one plain black, one plain blue, and one plain red. They’re identical other than the color.

When I told a long time friend this today his immediate response was, “Wait… you’ve been wearing the same pants all these times I’ve seen you in the past few months?”

Yup. Know why? Because IT DOESN’T MATTER and no one really even notices. People are way too busy evaluating whether or not they look okay to actually judge how you look.

Pop quiz—what was your best friend wearing yesterday? Can you remember what anyone was wearing yesterday?

I’m not saying fashion doesn’t matter at all. It does, and I’m glad the industry exists. My shirts fit me well, and that makes me happy. I like that my pants are relatively slim. I think it’s great to have clothes that you enjoy that look good on you. Having a unique style that reflects your personality is an excellent thing.

And I’d be lying if I told you that my pulse doesn’t quicken just a hair when I see a girl who is dressed perfectly.

What bothers me is the pervasive attitude of caring SO MUCH about one’s image. And of course I’ve been a sucker for this worse than 99% of the people. I just had to have a Mercedes and designer clothes and a Rolex and all that garbage. I was focused on it.

I see people now who are so obviously OBSESSED with what they look like and I feel this deep pity. I know that I could try to explain all this to them, but they wouldn’t care. I wouldn’t have cared either.

What I’ve learned is that people don’t care who you LOOK LIKE, they care who you ARE. If your clothes give a hint about who you REALLY are, that’s great. If they’re pushing you as someone you’re not, you’ve got a major problem on your hands.

Focus on what matters. Image is an easy way to feel like you’re improving yourself without actually having to do it.

Hated ItBoringSolidGreatA Classic (15 votes, average: 3.87 out of 5)
Loading ... Loading ...

If you liked this post, you might like these related posts:

  1. My Assault on Stuff & What I’m Doing Next My recent war that I’ve been waging has been against stuff. For a while (and by that I mean since 7th grade), I’ve produced my own income and spent most...
  2. The Legend of the Sequin Hat The Legend of the Sparkly Hat Anyone who has seen me in real life, seen pictures, or realized that the awesome cartoon at the top of this page is me,...

Stop Being Single

If you're not happy with your dating life do yourself a favor and pick up a copy of my AWESOME book, Make Her Chase You.

After becoming one of the most famous pick up artists in the world (one of the main characters of The Game), I wrote a definitive guide to learning pick up. Inside you'll learn how to attract the girls you really want, without using creepy tricks or gimmicks.

Click to read more about Make Her Chase You on Amazon

There are 15 Comments.


Vanmartin
Oct 31st, 2008 @ 3:04 am

Yes! Nice post - interesting and to the point. Not sure what the relevance of the gun/gold bit had but was but it made for an interesting intro anyway.


Vanmartin
Oct 31st, 2008 @ 3:04 am

Yes! Nice post - interesting and to the point. Not sure what the relevance of the gun/gold bit had was but it made for an interesting intro anyway.


Vanmartin
Oct 31st, 2008 @ 3:05 am

Apologies for the double post. Think I clicked the Submit Comment button twice


kim Barnett
Oct 31st, 2008 @ 5:43 am

Tynan! Thank you for this story. I TOTALLY agree with you 100% about clothes and its impact on society. I commend you on your observations and look forward to more insightful and refreshing musings!


norm
Oct 31st, 2008 @ 9:49 am

I think people are absolutely crazy paying what they do for clothes. For example, paying $40-$50 for a pair of jeans. I don’t buy jeans more expensive than $20. I’ve had a real hard time finding a new jacket because they are all insanely priced. I picked up the tag of a simple jacket at Sears last weekend and the price was $120. I’ve never had “sticker shock” before but I felt it then. There’s no reason why clothes cost so much.

Oct 31st, 2008 @ 2:31 pm

Tynan,

At the young age of 27, you have had an epiphany that some people never get - that what really matters is who you are. I’ll take substance over style every time. However, there are many people who are still attached to appearances - not only how they look (as in what we wear) but how they make things appear - like at work when the boss does everything to give the impression that he or she “appears” to be on top of things when in reality they have no clue what they are doing.

Dr. John

Oct 31st, 2008 @ 5:51 pm

I have done my own experiment with down-sizing and have had similar experiences.

My effort has not been anywhere near as extreme as yours, but I’m slowly gravitating in that direction.

I’ve actually noticed that a huge benefit of having less stuff is that choices become much easier. No more deliberating over what to wear, what product to put in your hair, etc.

So Tynan, what is next on your list to down-size? Or do you think you’ve gotten things pared down as much as you care to?

Ravi in rainy Seattle, WA -USA

Nov 1st, 2008 @ 10:36 am

sorry - but what do you when your pants are in the wash - and how often do you wash them???

Nov 1st, 2008 @ 12:57 pm

I think the point about the guns / gold store is that their customers may be of a certain mindset - that of an apocalyptic future - where society may degenerate to a state where man must show strength through guns and where gold is the then only accepted currency. Anyway, insightful point and the commentary on the clothes is equally insightful.

Here’s my personal problem on this though, I agree that a materialistic outlook on life is a sure recipe for unhappiness, and I further agree that a man’s inner self is his DEFINING characteristic to the world, but darn it…I LOVE the look of women who clearly are shoppers and who are meticulous with their clothing, shoes, etc. It presses an important button in my reptilian brain…so from that perspective I feel that I need to be dressed up (not necessarily in designer clothes, shopping at Neimans would break me), so I can appeal to the target market that I’m so attracted to. I’m not much into the (somewhat) common Austin female look of wearing sensible shoes etc. Ah well, great post though.

Nov 1st, 2008 @ 1:10 pm

@Angell - I have a speedo that I wear when my pants are washing. They don’t need to be washed often - maybe once a week unless I’ve run in them or they’ve gotten dirty somehow.

@John - I don’t think there’s anything wrong with dressing well as long as it’s not an obsession or priority. It’s possible to have a simple, well fitting, stylish wardrobe. I’m not sure I’ve ever met a man whose time would be best spent shopping, in terms of net attractiveness to women.

Nov 1st, 2008 @ 6:45 pm

OK Tynan, you motivated me to fill up 2 garbage bags full of clothes that will either be thrown out or donated.

Ravi


Wolfy
Nov 1st, 2008 @ 9:36 pm

Girls who look like the ones you see on “The Hills” and other MTV shows kind of disgust me. I can’t take that “high fashion”, celebrity look because it’s a good sign that their inner self is ugly (i.e. shallow and materialistic). It’s a generalization, sure, but it’s consistently right on the money. Of all the impressive women I’ve met, none of them dress that way. This is not mere chance, there’s something to this…


Kelsey
Nov 2nd, 2008 @ 11:06 pm

Asia was wearing a black tank top from Urban Outfitters yesterday with a pair of regular wash jeans, and Rainbow flip flops. Carole was wearing a black tank top, black work out pants and black Guess shoes. Taylor was wearing Jesus sandals, light wash jeans, a striped v-neck t-shirt with a cream cardigan over……………..but I notice these things……I think that looks matter because it’s the first thing that people notice about you…they can’t tell your personality by looking at you…unlessssss you portray it through your clothing!


Todd
Nov 3rd, 2008 @ 12:10 pm

I think if you combine Kelsey’s viewpoint and Tynan’s you get a good overall look at what people think and what really matters.

Like Tynan says, people really care who you ARE, not what you LOOK like.

However, as Kelsey said, people still make judgments about who you ARE based on how you ACT and what you LOOK like.

Women tend to notice the details of what you are wearing a lot more than men, from my experience. But, men still make judgments of women (and men) based on what they wear.

Once you actually know who people ARE, that is what most people really care about (at least thats what I care about).

For example, if I see someone wearing skate shoes I will sometimes assume that they like to skate or bike… because I do not actually know them, I can only judge them based on what I see.

If I see a girl wearing FCUK clothing (some french designer, I think) or some other ‘designer’ clothing I will subconsciously make judgments about them… they like to shop and buy expensive clothing…maybe they are overly materialistic…etc.

It is human nature to make judgments about people, some people judge others more harshly that one people do. Some people pass judgments and think that those judgments are 100% true, and they don’t give people a chance.

I make judgments about people I see, but I always give them the chance to show me who they really are..and that is what matters in my mind.

I could go on and in more detail, but I think the majority of you understand what I am saying.


Magnus
Nov 3rd, 2008 @ 6:27 pm

I agree.

Although you should see the $700 blazer I got in Vegas.

Join the discussion! Use the form below to add your thoughts.


Your comment

Tynan.net is written, designed, and coded by Tynan. All rights reserved, no content other than excerpts with return links may be reproduced without permission. Icons by Dry Icons.